Forgive me I've been through this before, but as always I feel the desire to repeat myself(repeat myself)! My (puny) mind is not my friend today (or any other day for that matter!)
Seemingly my brain has the ability to have a look at any environment and perceive "what is" and relate it back to loony tunes central in double quick time as being depressingly inadequate (no surprise there then). So as a result I always end up listening to the voice (just one) in my head like some kind of Humphrey Bogart character in some classic noir film! "OK so the man wants to see you next Monday" (you really have to be in character and do the voice) "what's it all about?" I ask tentatively, "some kind of rota that you have put together" damn and blast (my mind at this stage would be well into overdrive) they don't like it, they are going to say that it's unworkable! they'll tell me this because they can (hey its what I would do ....but would I?) they are power mad and if they don't get to "tweak it"they won't have any control or even any power over me (like some kind of deranged solar panel) their power is derived from their ability to say yay or nay! forcing change where change is not required, simply because they can, they do not understand the legal ramifications (damn when did this get all serious) and the potential to send me and my little universe into a tail spin!
I should call them (yeah why not your on holiday and this started out as a bit of fun) tell them I don't want to play politics or their tedious little mind games and all the crap that goes with it! I know I will just quit (oooh an idea) yes that's what I will do, I will quit, I will bugger off to some quaint English village and write my great novel(that will never be published by a proper publisher let alone be filmed or turned into a spin off TV series although my vision would sit well with the HBO ethos....WTF OK stick with me boys and girls I know where this is going!) But no I will stay in my dead end job and turn into (what do you mean turn!) one of those bitter and twisted old men, I'll end up in some down and out pub blaming the world and all that is in it (this really does sound ...ah lets not go there) and sit around all day playing dominoes (sounds like a plan!) asking what happened to all the good things in life?
So in reality (it comes flooding back in like the cold Atlantic into the lower decks of the Titanic) I won't quit (I still have to service the national debt of Peru for at least the next four years) I'll just become (what do you mean become, no lets not go there I'm fragile enough) a diva! I know I'll just be difficult (tee hee) no more than I am already, but in all likelihood I will roll over and have my belly rubbed, covert apathy (now that I can do ....I suppose) that's the way forward, they won't get to me, I don't care (damn I do I always have!) By Monday morning after being off for nine days (and only checking your Blackberry for your work emails every other day ....allegedly!) allowing my paranoia to build up to a tipping point of no return, I will lash out at the slightest provocation! "Hey Colin would you like a coffee " "Feck you and the horse you rode in on I quit" (back in the voice of Humphrey Bogart) but then imagine my surprise when they tell me they love what I have come up with, and they want to implement it straight away! They love the rota the plan the entire direction that I intend to steer the company in! You know I will in a small and humble voice come back with "yeah well it's a work in progress still need to polish it a bit more, I'm sure I can make it a whole lot better" .
While all along that little voice in my head whispers "they are lying ....learn to play dominoes"!
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