Delirious

The year ends tomorrow so this is the last blog of 2012, so lets keep it short and sweet, the last long weekend of the year, it's also the wife's birthday today (hippy bathday) so thankfully we are getting ready in a relaxed way to go and enjoy ourselves, shame the wife is driving, I'm sure I will have one or two for her, if truth be told she hasn't endured well the last couple of times, so maybe it's just as well she never seems to need a drink for her to enjoy herself, I suppose it's the thought she can't even if she wants to.

This year has dragged (a bit like some of my blogs this year) with less good bits scattered throughout the year a cunning plan is in the groove so hopefully we will enjoy a few more excursions here and there, last year we put all the eggs into one basket and I was so poorly (god punishing me) during the one big excursion but we prevailed, good company helped me endure and I still intend to repay the kindness (when I can think of a suitable way) my aching body continues in it's downward spiral but watch this space as  there will be more updates as I pull out all the stops to be a fit and healthy fifty year old in just over 23 months time, I know some of the long timers know that I have beating this particular drum for as along as I have blogged but the line in the sand is there and starts with the first day of the new year and of my new fitter life, small footsteps but the start of the climb is there.

Today as I have already said is an easy day after the blog I have dinner to sort a quick dip in the bath (I have long since given up hope of making myself pretty) and a slow drive to sunny South Shields to meet up with The Tee Hee Club for some fun and tribulations.  I must say many thanks to the many readers out there (and yes there are a few) not as many as the last blog page  but we are rising slowly but steadily, thanks for all the comments all the cheery little emails and the slanderous posts that I could never allow to be posted on the page (remember the R word) thanks for all of those who (cheat ) do the name game and Nils I don't believe you are that bad you just need to see your name up in lights.

The books will continue for a short while to come but as I have previously stated there is an endgame and hopefully that should be stuck to, as is the plan to blog no more than twice a week a game plan that should help me in my quest for a healthier life style and not to be glued to my lap top 365 days a year (hahahaha) we can but but try and with that I bid you all happy new year keep on spreading the disease lets see if we can get to triple digits in the new year so until then .........Toodles!

Toxic

Well it's nearly over for another year, we just have to negotiate with the terrorists today (eldest and Junior) if we can sail through those stormy waters we might just be able to say that we have had an enjoyable one.

Christmas eve was surprisingly quiet, even me being less Grinch like than normal, a bit of the old TV answering a few emails and then off to bed, I'm not complaining it was all gooood! A late lie in on the day itself, but we stumbled towards the presents and although it has been a quiet year for presents even for the youngest, I think it's about the day and not how much we spent on each other (if I keep saying that, someday, somebody might believe it other than me) Pressies opened I set about doing what I love doing most on the day and that's the dinner!

The bird was cooked first thing (no not the wife) then I par boiled my spuds for roasting and then everything else fell into place a nice steady pace with more than enough for everybody to tuck into just my pigs in blankets were actually late (I do miss my double oven) but everything else was fine and dandy, once the madding crowd had been fed it was time to watch a bit of Skyfall on the goggle box and start in on Dr Vodka with my new glass which unbelievably didn't run dry all day (yum yum). The Kracken for once was in a good place and didn't deviate too many times to doom and gloom avenue, all in all a good day (for us) although not all of our friends went the way of Christmas present, some suffered power cuts, family feuds and generally world war three, we still  have to get through today so lets see how we hold up.

The only problem were the parsnips which were absolutely fab, but myself and the whole of Gimpsville suffered the Toxic pollution that was the result of a broken clack inverter (a broken hoop) eight hours of vapours polluting the Christmas spirit might not have been the best thing! hahahaha trust me I hate it as much as anything else, my cunning plan to cure the issue doesn't seem to be working as well of late so today is plan B and there will be no consumption of the perilous parsnips at all!

The Chicken is in the oven as we speak and today I shall being cooking Yorkshire Puddings and again there should be enough for everyone to chill and relax (Fingers and everything else crossed) and hopefully go with the flow having said that the eldest and The Kraken are not the best mix and it's not always two good days in a row if you go to church today say a little prayer for us please.

Then there was the hate mail (see you knew it was too good to be true) a number of people asking me why I am quitting? well if you read the blog correctly I'm not quitting (just yet) I'm just sorting out my exit strategy, it might be five years it might be five months, I haven't decided yet! as long as I'm enjoying the writing part of my life then it will continue, so hold your horses, don't get your knickers in a twist, I'm here for now so just enjoy (if you do enjoy it) and go with the flow, I am here for the time being, nobody knows what's around the corner but I have no intention of spoiling something that I at least enjoy doing (and a quite a few of you enjoying reading so it would seem) so for now it's back to books and quiet games chill relax be merry and fuck the world ......Toodles!
   

Partners in Crime.

This had been planned for months and nothing was going to get in our way, many things tried to, but we mowed them down as soon as anything stood in our way!

The wife had been suffering what with her back,but then late on Monday she came down with the lurgy and this set her off in panic mode, but with the right coaxing she calmed down loaded herself up on drugs and and by the morning of the do she was operating at around 96% , we could live with that, there were as always one or two other niggles nothing that we couldn't ignore (yes we chose to ignore how bad are we) I had come into a small windfall (totally out from the left field) but our pay department didn't do the deed so the windfall although partially spent hasn't arrived and won't be there until......who knows?

Yet another Friday off and a day full of doubt about my writing, and a decision made to have some kind of game plan(control)to finish this writing stuff on my terms, yes I do see a time when I finish writing, your comments are always welcome and do give me a wonderful lift at times when obviously I come across as a call for the Samaritans, but it's feeling slightly one dimensional and anyone who is on a treadmill knows that it soon gets boring, I intend to quit while I'm ahead and get out while I'm enjoying what a write! The books have turned into a mega vanity project with tons of hits for reading the preview pages, but sales...well I was never intending to get rich, they are priced as cheaply as possible (I make no profit off them) but times are hard out there, so again unless I can figure something out I can see the end of the road, I have no intention of having more comebacks than Frank Sinatra, so don't let it be a surprise when the road finally runs out!

What's that got to do with the blog I hear you shout, well its the start so wind your neck and sit down this is going to get bumpy! Money issues put to one side and a game plan set we settled down on Friday night to be prepared for the coming day. I was woke up by the steady stream of rain bleaching against the window, we had to have a jolly jaunt to return a hire car after the outcome of the Kraken's Evil Knivel impersonation, we were in a jovial mood and were soon back from Durham where I thought we might experience some turbulence but thankfully we didn't, so in reality we just had to make ourselves pretty before the night.

We pottered and listened to the rain that was still coming down and just after dinner we decided to watch a rom-com for all the ladies so we watched Dredd and yeah it was OK a perfect film for whiling away a wet Saturday afternoon, a quick discussion on what I was intending to wear (not that it matters as I'm officially back to being a fat bastard again) and the wife returned to the Kraken's to deposit the old man of the house to be attended to. we soon got ready and headed out to jump on the peasant wagon which was thankfully only partially full and the journey relatively quick, the only moment of humour was a gentleman getting on at Bensham who spent the short while he was on the bus drawing on the windows (alrighty then). We alighted from the omnibus and took a circuitous route under cover to the bank and only had a minor heart failure when the first machine said "yes you have money but what do you want it for ....jog on" thankfully the next machine gave us what we wanted, crisis averted we headed into Lick Your Hoop surprisingly to find it rammed (ah home game for the toon) we headed up the stairs and found some of our co conspirators, the wife was starting to panic as we had a lift planned home but they dropped out last minute, (hope everything is OK) there were others who had intend to come but changed course to avoid icebergs, but there were others who were suffering under the lurgy, G and E had turned up G in a rather fetching nurse's outfit but no matter how much care and attention was lavished on E she couldn't help herself she was just being so nice to him you could see she was in deep pain, but it was fab to see them even though they were heading home before heading to the bordello. Not before some cunning plans were hatched!(as always far too many to come to fruition I am going to post one of my kidney's on E-bay!)

We said  our farewells and what was left of our party headed of to Nancy's and for a change we weren't the first through the door but we weren't that far behind, so we snaffled our regular corner and settled in for a cosy (ahem) night. As always I feel as though it's the wife's night (she could make friends in an empty room) and I always feel that I will fade into the gloom, but as always I'm proved wrong and there is soon lots of peeps who chat on to me, as well as people trying to take my picture (grrr) and as always on viewing said pictures this morning I look like a fecking whale, I really do need to keep my mouth shut and try and get back to losing weight! The night flew and although we were worrying because our designated Taxi firm wasn't accepting bookings until after ten (looking ominous) but we plunged ahead with the merry making and the fab conversations and generally it was a pretty fab night some people as always were indeed missed but you knuckle down and try to carry on well you have to don't you! (Tee Hee) there were still lots of peeps talking about the old times and about music , but for one moment I felt unhappy I was molested and abused all the while it was being photographed (oh the horror) but I fought back and kept shutting my eyes at the wrong time (allegedly).

Many birthday drinks were bought for the wife (well it is only a week away) and she was a good girl she paced herself really well, then there was some more dancing, some more talking and some new friends being introduced (I felt like an adult) but as always when I go to these do's, the night starts with trepidation and always ends with joyous sadness, because always it has to end some times, we did get a taxi and it was only a little earlier than planned and we were soon whisked back to Gimpsville, by the most pleasant driver we have had in months, once through the door we didn't hang about we hit the hay as soon as possible. I awoke this morning feeling refreshed but the wife was under the weather (warm vodka does that to you) but nowhere near as bad potentially as it could have been, a good result all around and with only one small mishap with the Kraken (nothing serious but she was upset so you have to do the right thing) I do wish I had took a note book because the amount of ideas flowing out of me last night for the blog were phenomenal and as I sit here typing today, it seems like nothing ( I was never going to do a blow by blow account of the evening please be aware we came we saw we kicked it's ass) we now have Junior sat causing mayhem while we do the good deed and (surprise surprise) the eldest tried to take the piss and lo and behold we ignored her  hahahaha .

Now to just get through the rest of the night (I shall be attempting to cook some Lamb) and then hopefully a quiet day at work and then the night of the year that I hate most (you have read the blogs and the books if not why the hell not? it's not too late in the day to buy or read the bloody things) and then the big day itself so although I might be writing I'm not expecting to be posting anything any time soon (yeah right) so bear with me and go with the flow. so that's it have a fab time of the year, play nice and try not to be too cruel cherry mistmass! oh and while I remember everybody else is talking about them so lets get it going worldwide Lady J had legs last night real live legs that were feminine and just the right size ooops I thought I had better tell everybody! oooh I can see a Farcebook page being formed, well OK maybe's not I value my flesh far too much until the next time .....Toodles!

Everything you did

I'm sitting here keeping the plates spinning nice and slow, My brain is still fried but I passed my exam and completed my project for good or bad it's done, I'm trying to stop the world spinning out in the wrong direction, I believe i have slowed it, I just need it to go my way (for once) lets see where we go!

All my fruits are still growing (oo er) and hopefully we shall see some produce for the weekend, I wanted to see and confirm some good news earlier but as always I need to sit and wait like a good boy waiting for Christmas....actually I am...waiting that is, hahahaha the weekend is peaking over the top and I can't wait, but there are still way too many potential bomb shells that could drop in our lap I wish we could have a weapons embargo from within the family, but we will keep fighting in the vain hope that we can win a few battles if not the war!

I'm off tomorrow I have been enjoying these four day weeks but it won't last, it never does so let's go with the flow and hope it flows past a happy place, I have been looking forward to our planned outing at the weekend so I don't want to jinx it, hopefully hi jinx and fun and games to write about on Sunday morning so here's fingers crossed, Christmas seems as if it has been coming down the lane forever this time next week we will be back to bitching and moaning about the weather!

My mood has perked (oops sense of doom) up this week and hopefully over the break some more writing will take place to ensure that the next book will be in place to go to the publishers by the end of January, hopefully there shouldn't be as long a gap between books I don't have many vices but writing is the one I like the most (damn you Chris Harrison hahahaha) there will be more Toodle's books than originally planned but hey ho that's just the way it is!

Blog numbers to paraphrase a certain movie "have been off the chain" so that has helped my mood for all the writing, but I'm not pushing it too much I do have tons of smaller nuggets which will get used in the blogs, this well isn't dry and I want to polish and nurture what comes out so bear with me as we navigate the rocks to drill to bring the juice to the top of the pipeline hahahaha I really must concentrate instead of producing drivel hahahaha as if!

Work has as always been the root of all evil and the main reason why my brain has been fried, I need to recharge and sooner rather than later, cunning plans are being formed as we speak for the coming year nothing too fancy but my days off are booked and loaded for bear, so watch this space, I must admit to being off the pace as I sit and remember friends, who I haven't seen or even spoke to in such a long time and although I haven't been in contact with them in what seems like a long time (nor they with me but hey ho that's life), they are in my thoughts and I know when they re appear in my life it will seem like only yesterday, that we were as always taking  the piss and having a laugh, my mood is one of tiredness and not melancholy boys and girls, so don't despair, take hope that tomorrow will bring a new me to the table and a new blog might appear with more cohesion and direction but for now this what I have to offer, a little boy who normally dislikes Christmas trying his best to enjoy the season of (cough) goodwill for all it's worth and to see if it's as good as it's cracked up to be hahahahaha.

So chill relax kick back stack the wood on the fire and have a drink or two, play Christmas music (or dodgy 70's rock music like me hahahaha) but whatever you do, Love the ones around you even those that annoy you (sorry E you married G he's all yours!) because you never know if this could indeed be the last time you see them and then all you have is memories and regrets, with that maudlin thought I blow you all goodnight kisses and will see you on the other side of this blog so until the next one, watch the skies there could be a fat man in a suit on your roof and no it's not me it's more likely be SMOR as he has the bloody suit.......Toodles!

Bang Bang

So the weekend sneaks in and I have sat here plodding away at work (that should really be done at work rather than bringing it home to distract me from the family) and I have to admit I'm not overly impressed with the way the world has spun this week, again as always I have got ahead of myself follow the thread and watch how easy things can unravel.

After the last blog I should imagine that you will know that I'm toast totally fried and if I'm honest just waiting to pull the blankets up over 2012, York seems like a lifetime ago and the week (as described in the previous blog) has dragged, I did My exam and I have no idea whether I have passed, I still have the project to conclude (hopefully by next week) but the coming week hopefully should be trying to get all the manageable ends back under some semblance of control (hahahaha) Life wasn't done with me on Thursday, I was just through the door when everybody else turned up, The Kraken's little dog deposited on the front seat of her car and we were back indoors so quick my head spun,  the Kraken headed off knew that she would struggle to get out the top of the lane, so she took a small detour out of the side street and then shot across the road through traffic and finally coming to a halt at a shop window, thankfully nobody was hurt, just her car and the one that she hit, (millions wasted in lawyers fees I can foresee)  the emergency services were fab and as quick as the accident had happened, all traces (with the exception of a scratch on the shop window frame) were gone like it never happened.

The Kraken is still shook up so I have a feeling this could run for a while, and although I was off yesterday as we had tickets to see a small independent film (The Hobbit you may have heard of it) I think we were both unsure as to whether to leave her, the weather being as bad as it was, we went it kicked our ass and we got home as quickly as possible, today as I have already moaned about it has been primarily work and then this little blog. We wanted to go and see Chaos Asylum tonight but it's simply not going to happen hopefully next time.

The rest of the day will be spent trying to stop me being a gloomy guts (and no I'm no looking for sympathy I'm not down in the dumps or suicidal just my get up and go has got up and fucked off) I have to build up to next weekend for the Jubilee's reunion where there should be lots of mad people having mad fun, mad drinking and some peculiar dancing, so that is something for me to look forward to hahahaha and no I shall not be dancing, so I hope everybody chills and relax's has a great time this weekend but spare the horses because next weekend should be a doozy so until the next time watch the skies ......Toodles!

Running on ice

After the last couple of blogs I don't think I really have that much to say other than to keep my hand in so that's exactly what I will attempt to do.

So here we are once more, back to work back to reality, and back to the grind all the words and bile you can use and more, I had kept my work's phone on the Friday before the jaunt to York, but switched it off knowing that hardly anybody had tried to contact me, it helped with the stress levels, the weekend rushed passed like the train we rode on York in hahahahaha, Monday came early start up at 4.30, my usual routine (which we really don't need to go into right here right now) I was ready with time to spare, so I thought I would turn my work phone on, it went off like some kind of machine gun over thirty e-mails going ping ping ping one after another, I thought I had woke up the whole state of Gimpsville this didn't bode well! thankfully most of it was information, but I was scared scared scared!

This week seemed to be full of courses and exams and as I sit and type this drivel tomorrow is fast approaching like a wave of doom along with one last exam, I am fried my brain is just so wasted I was dragged out of my course today to go deal a major situation (thankfully it wasn't as bad as suspected) a distraction that I could have done without, the course itself is a doddle and the exam I should walk but in the mock exam this afternoon I passed, but not with a high score and I wasn't bothered or even interested, some peoples thought I looked tired and if I'm honest this has been a long long year, with still lots to do, I love it but sometimes the burn out factor kicks me right in the ass, will I pass tomorrow I hope so, as it won't look good if I don't, so lets hope for an early night and a better attitude in the morning hahahahahaha yeah right!

The title isn't such a misstep as I missed my regular lift and was heading for the peasant transport with all the Christmas shoppers  that I love (not)when I was offered a lift by a person who moves down my shit list a couple of places (but not off it altogether) and I was very grateful for the lift but rather than come all the way into Gimpsville I got dropped off next to where they live (I was grateful, I didn't want to owe them anything hahahaha) I was dropped about a quarter of a mile from my house which was very Icy, I regretted not selling my soul to the very devil and walked like a crippled old man home, each step being like being stabbed repeatedly in my knees, I don't like this old age malarkey.

The new book is here and although it was a ghastly bloody nightmare I really do wish I was a tad more of a nerd, The font was all collated the same and the same size as well, yet when printed to the site some of them have been changed, so after wrestling with the computer  I gave up it's here and it's........OK the newer bits are the bits I prefer, only because I have hardly lived with them and I think they are fine and dandy, you decide (buy a bloody copy) now to use a big stick and try and appease the wife who is still fighting the lurgy and is being a major pain ("oh no I'm not" "oh yes you are") after wrestling Junior who hasn't slept at all today, Panto season is well and truly here! and that's me heading out of Dodge until the next time or when I can be arsed .....Toodles!

Invisible

Ok so this blog was meant to be named a lot of the things "The Rage" "Dixie Chicken" to name but two, but as I type away into oblivion I believe the title I have chose shall be the correct one, so you guys let me know?

The week itself dragged, work was a major pain just because of the amount of work being thrown my way and nowhere near enough time to complete, I feel as though at the moment I'm fighting a losing battle, but I will knuckle down and get on with the life in hand, pointless moaning about it it has to be done so lets crack on. Monday and Tuesday was busy, busy, busy and then Wednesday Thursday taken up by yet another course (life seems to revolve around courses these days) Friday I was off to rest and recuperate do the odd job (and more course work) but in main to get ready for the weekend which would soon be upon us!

The week itself at home had been very traumatic, what with local weather conditions and me looking after Junior, while the wife went off to get the youngest from college, something which would normally take about fifty minutes ended up taking over five and a half with the youngest being kept safe at my place of employment(thanks to those that came to our assistance at my hour of need) and the wife going through a journey from hell including the car breaking down and a good Samaritan coming to her assistance all the while with me sat in the house going out of my mind because I couldn't do anything to assist, the weekend couldn't get here quick enough for either of us.

Friday arrived and the wife had a few tasks to compete with the Kraken, so me and the youngest got on and did what we had to do some stuff here some stuff there and so when the wife turned up to take the entire clan (excluding me) to the Kraken's the day had slipped into darkness, we lay around like loppy dogs upon her return all tasks just about completed, all we really needed (and it had been planned as such) was an early night so we could arise refreshed in the following morning, OK so you all know us we soon went astray we were all settled and ready for our pit when the wife decided that she needed to sort out the music on her phone (it will only take a few minutes......fifty minutes later and the threat of a dummy being spat out) we finally headed up the stairs and soon we were (trying to be) asleep.

The morning came and even with all the alarms set, I struggled to climb out of my pit, but once on the move I was an unstoppable force. Bath breakfast clothes on and hot to trot, we headed out the door on time, but we were weary and not quite firing on all six cylinders, we boarded the bus but the wife was soon mumbling protests about the mode of transport, the driver was having some issues but seemed to have it under control ....well that was until about halfway when he killed the engine and called the depot to say he couldn't go any further(air brakes sensors and other things that if you travel by bus you are used to but if you travel in a car you will whinge constantly about) the wife was just going to go atomic as we were indeed on a tight schedule to get to our destination, when thankfully (for him) he told us he was putting us all on the bus that was a minute behind us (different service different depot but it got us there around about the same time) and we rushed into the station to meet our co-conspirators and to make our way with time to spare to our train platform.

Now E is a demon of the airwaves and had managed to get us cheap tickets to go to York in first class, so we were soon ensconced in our seats playing with buttons and sliding our seats watching while G had two cups of coffee all the while being abused with gay abandon by his loving wife.The main course for concern being his coat shedding feathers here there and every where (and yes indeed I nearly went with white feather as a title as well) The journey not being overly long we had soon slipped through the English countryside and were deposited on a bright pavement outside York Station. the day was dry but wet weather was forecast for later on in the day, it was at this point that we soon realised that we were all invisible as we were to learn that York was populated by ignorant Stevie Wonder's who bashed into people without a care or apology for doing so, but we took our lumps and headed into the middle of York (with G now needing a toilet because of the second cup of coffee) we bimbled around saw some sites, got knocked by more people and decided potentially where we were going to have something to munch later on!

We sauntered far and wide and were tempted by a pasty (just the one) but we didn't dawdle because the empty shop next to the bakers was full of flies so there was obviously something dead within the unit, we moved along munching as we went, we then hit the first pub of the day which was a favourite from previous visits, it was to be the first of many small disappointments, now I like a good time and the pub and the beer was quite nice but most of the available space was given over to the serving of food so the bar was soon rammed, with far more people coming to the door and seeing how full it was and then moving along, the people who were there again were just loud and obnoxious (hey we know how to have a good time but this wasn't it, well not at just after eleven o'clock in the morning in a space the size of most people's bathrooms!) and the rest of the day would be blighted by loud and ignorant people. We finished our drinks and we went back to more roaming.

Finally we needed to quench our thirst one more time (we needed to see if we were doing it right) we arrived at another pub and we were soon sat and drinking (well actually two members of the party were playing on their bloody phones weren't they G) again the pub soon became uncomfortable, so we again moved on this time to get some much needed food. We arrived at a Hog roast shop we had spotted before and we soon were sorted standing on the pavement after buying half a pig and little portion of Lamb between us when two aresholes attempted to get us too move away from an innocuous doorway (you're standing in my mam's business's door stopping customers) now I as always missed this opening gambit, but I did hear G's reply which informed them that he wasn't, but if anyone did indeed require access he would indeed move! not good enough, more bile spewed and then stomping past G all the while the fat pierced one who we think was female bashed into G who was very restrained and quite polite, they disappeared up a set of stairs only to be followed by a heavier set of footsteps (oooh somebody much bigger for us to play with) rushing down towards us, who was even more abusive claiming his son had been abused, again G showing much restraint told them to get on with it (without any swearing I hasten to add, I was well impressed) the bigger man of the family didn't come any further (he wasn't that brave) the mother swept past us to have a go at the hog roast shop staff who politely ignored them.

The bubble being burst the shine was off the day and just about everywhere we went after that,there was nothing but noisy drunk ignorant people, who as a rule of thumb we don't mind, but this was everywhere, we enjoyed York the place and as always we enjoyed our company, but if we had weapons York would have resembled an episode of The Walking Dead with us shooting everybody in it's wake! as darkness once again surrounded us we headed back to the train station and then it struck us that what we needed was a cream tea that would sort us out, so we found a suitable place and ventured into this brightly lit enclave of englishness and ordered a cream tea G wanted a beef sandwich but was happy enough with a piece of carrot cake but was disappointed with the lack of carrots sticking out of his cake! we enjoyed ourselves and had giggles with our cream tea and stuff even the staff got in on the event when (yet again) G was getting told off for one of the many things on the shit list that he carries around with him, at least they didn't complain about all of the feathers!

We headed back out under the cover of the all consuming darkness and headed down to  the eye to see how many body parts we would have to sell to gain entry and even though we all fancied a go, We didn't see the point of throwing all that money at a go on a covered in Ferris wheel and so we headed into the train station to double check our return trains progress from London, and as it was on time we headed off to find yet another hostelry that would provide us with drink and sustenance and finally we found one that was not stuffed to the gills and there was food, so we did the thing that were put on this trip for, we had some drink and some food which was nice, we were going to have to wait for the grub but we didn't mind....that was until yet another loud mouthed oaf sat next to us (there's only six of you and there is nothing loud playing in the pub and yet you have to shout at the top of your lungs....tosser) thankfully our food arrived and we tucked in yum yum yum!

All done and dusted we headed back out into the fine drizzle and headed back into the train station to be met like we were in eighties Belfast and were all but body searched as we headed out onto the platform (the staff were actually nice but must have shit loads of trouble on a weekend) we climbed on board to be met with the last arse of the day thankfully we were soon in our seats chatting and generally relaxing (by this time the wife was not in good shape physically although we had drank through the day, we were all good boys and girls but the length of the day had worn her out ) when serendipity sat up and smacked me right in the face coming down the aisle (in his full time job) was Rob Weir (you mean you don't know who The Tygers Of Pan Tang are good grief where have you been all this time?) and it took all of my powers to behave, I just wanted to talk to him throwing in Tygers song titles in the mix, but I was a good boy and just chuckled and posted crap on Farcebook about it!

We arrived at our home station to a cold windy empty platform but we soon spotted somebody we all knew and it was great to see Davey B just finishing his shift,Davey is another one of the gang hardly ever seen due to work and various other bits and pieces and it was the icing on a good day (spoilt by ignorant loud mouth arseholes) we said our farewells to our co-conspirators and headed for the bus to head home, which if truth be told was generally uneventful but way too hot for the wife and we got off three stops from home to stop her day being totally ruined, thankfully out in the fresh air she recovered (G could have helped with the tight bra, he's helpful like that) the bug bear was we had to walk up the steepest bank in the neighbourhood to get home, which finished me off but at least the wife wasn't suffering. Once home we watched a little TV (OK the wife watched I blinked), then when able we headed up the stairs to Narnia.

We woke up this morning me crippled from the waist down (nothing new there) and the wife suffering from flu, ah the joys of being punished for being dictators in an earlier life, we schmoozed through the day watching Led Zeppelin from the O2 (nope still don't get it) and then ACDC live from River Plate which was cracking then I had to be pointed towards the direction of the computer as it had been seven days since my last confession I mean blog but you knew that anyway. all that remains is yet another week at work with as always yet another two days of course work and a day off on Friday which we were hoping to see The Hobbit but we will see how the pennies fall.

The new book should be here soon enough and those of you who should expect a copy (Broadsword calling Danny boy) will indeed get a pressie from a fat man (no not Santa me) hahaha so with that I head out to sort myself for an early night as this is my week of earlies so that in itself is soooooo wonderful (yes sarcasm button is stuck) so enjoy the blog (as so many people have, as the numbers have been through the roof enjoy and until the next time ........Toodles!

Countdown to zero

And so the countdown begins back to work tomorrow, I'm frightened to even go near my work email account, I will do it in the morning, but I am scared very scared hahahaha.

The week has flown over in a flash, not sure what we did or what happened, hahahaha maybe someone out there can tell me, I know I blogged extensively at the early part of the week as intended, but I had a book to finish and that I did after a bit of a nightmare! are you sitting comfortably then I will begin!

Monday brought on the onslaught of the hurricane (Junior)  and I did my duty and helped look after the little (hell's) angel, I'm still trying to work out why we look after the little biter , but we do and for the most part he is lovely (that's as close to cutie pie you will get out of me)   he rans us ragged but I didn't mind I was on holiday didn't I tell you that!

Tuesday the big day 33 (cough) or something close I can never remember, what the hell ! cards were thrust in my general direction, and fab one made by the youngest (at least I got one off her) and a pressie (a Fish Mug if you know me you will understand) and then the day was under way, the little biter doing what only he can, cause mayhem on a minor scale and then he just looks at you with those innocent eyes(unfortunately they don't work on Poppa) and the roller coaster went off in that direction at high speed, I started polishing and editing the book that had been sat there since May, I had left it alone, despondent about it not being able to get it published, but it seems we need to eat and pay utility bills first. so I sat down to read and sort out small bits and pieces, making sure that I had all the stuff that was required I had done two new chapters to sit at the back but I felt I was robbing you the paying public (yeah right get ya hand in your pockets) so I wrote a fresh opener (which if you go to blurb.com you will get to read it as the first fifteen pages are there for a preview) and played about with that , nothing massive as I realised that I didn't have the time to sit down and write an epic just something fresh, to lure you in and lull you into a false sense of hope!

Then it was Wednesday all in a flash and this was the main day for me to get writing for the next book (Buck Naked and the Nine Stone Cowboy some titles sound good at the time and you just have to go with them!), the one I had neglected the one I had lots of ideas for but not the inclination to get my arse into gear, so it was heads down arse up (in a non sexual kind of way) and over the course of the day I got three done "Coma" and yes the song title refers to the chapter so work out who the song title belongs to and that should give you an indication what it's all about (Alfie) Generation Landslide takes us all the way back to 1982. the third one well that's still a work in progress and I'm not sure if it has enough depth (generally i write about twenty five chapters and go with the ones with the best flow), I might give you all an indication towards the publishing date which at the moment is looking like being the end of January, I have nine chapters finished, but not polished and one I'm circling like a vulture because I'm not sure if I like it, we shall see don't worry as always you lot will be the first to know when it's done.

Thursday the Hurricane was blown out and sat with his Poppa almost silent and was soon on his way home, and me I did a little bit more writing and had been intending to get "Toodles" off to the publishers but the day was gone in a flash although I did end up with a bottle of Jack which I wasn't expecting, and then off to sleep to prepare for a bit of a do which Lady J had organised, the one that was at that particular moment in time giving me palpitations, why I hear you all ask? well I have no problem going to gatherings (large or small .....see E I'm available to rent) but I'm not used to being the centre of attention!

Friday came and we did all the things that you do when you are going out get your head sharpened (that's a haircut for the non English natives who have a tendency to read this) bathed and dressed and I was a good boy I was, I didn't harangue anybody for to get ready or ask them how long they were going to take, and we set off at the appointed time, dropped the old man of the house off at the Kraken's (her turn to do a good deed) and we set off into the night to our destination The heart of all England a lovely little Pub that cook's excellent grub, mind you we had to get there first as we sped through the dark country side with the wife driving to her I Pod and her screaming at people who didn't dip their lights fast enough, well you have read the blog's so I'm sure you get the picture.

We found a space to Park in lovely Historic Hexham and soon discovered that we were indeed the first one's there (eeh I was so happy, I love being on time me! hahahaha) we were escorted to the back area that was put aside for us and waited, soon peeps started showing up although our tattooed friend had given his apologies there was still a nice little gathering and I didn't feel as though it was night  all about me but a night for good friends and good food, another bottle (hic) and some lovely Chilli Jam and the meal was over as soon as it had began, we did what we do best we ate we drank we laughed (tee hee) you get the picture, Hells bells even a set of darts were produced not for long thankfully.

It was over as quickly as it had began and we separated us and G and E to headed off to Newcastle the others to call it a night, we said our fond farewell's and promised E that it was all downhill to the car, as she had climbed a mountain to get there with Sherpa G prodding and cajoling her all the way, then when everybody we strapped everybody  in and then we set off in our speed machine, there were only a few prayers offered up in the journey and potentially one "sweet Jesus" as G was otherwise occupied trying to claim the youngest's hand bag all the while receiving instructions from E "to shut the fuck up" and other words of encouragement, we made it to our destination and rushed the bar for drinkie poo's, it didn't seem as though we had been there long when all of a sudden they called time(WTF) thankfully another surge arrived and they had to cancel that thought.

Then it was indeed all over I had tried to publish the book earlier in the day and that was playing on mind (typical technology) and when we got back to Gimpsville there was snow on the bloody ground,I can do without that, we dropped the youngest off and reclaimed the old man of the house and headed home! Me stressing on what had changed with the settings of publishing the book, ah well that could wait until Saturday! Actually it didn't I left it until this morning and struggled with it and struggled with technology, but finally got there with only a few mishaps, I did discover that the book was over long as seeing as how I like to have new bits in and I didn't want to strip them out, so I took one of the blog chapters out and will add it to the next one which is due probably in about April, so plans and more plans all the time, Santa will be here earlier than expected and hopefully to Germany as well before Christmas watch the skies Mr Robinson.

There you go lots of cunning plans the month of December is upon us films to go and see, Work to do, next we ride on York to bring desolation on all who stand in our way, and don't worry E I will not be bringing a little book to take notes, I'm sure even I can hold that thought for twelve hours or so, play nice and keep spreading the word 435 views in the month of November so it's all starting to pick up momentum and watch the skies as there might be another blog by the end of the week so until then ....Toodles!