Leave your hat on

I’m going stir crazy this is day four off from work, its also the fourth blog in four days what the actual fuck is going on, ah well deep breath here goes!

I’ve been known to throw my hat into the ring when high profile jobs come along, I applied unsuccessfully for the position of pope (please see the applicable blog) I thought I could have done the job ok I’m not a catholic but surely that’s just a minor point! I get bored easily and I own a hat what else do I need?

I applied to move further up the chain of command at work did I want the job, hell no I just wanted an honest answer from my then area manager, oh and I wanted to put the fear of god into the work shy lazy bastards I used to supervise, there’s some great people on the team however there is one or two lazy people, like Epsom salts I would have got them to work! As it happens the wife took ill so I had to withdraw, which was a shame as I know I could have done the job, would I have been happy I doubt it, I do love the job I have now, but at the moment it weighs heavily on my shoulders and my knees aren’t what they used to be LOL

There was an old chap delivering the local free paper early on in the morning, he walked with a bad limp, I have one of those (from time to time) I could have done that, I didn’t get it, I was devasted, I even had previous experience delivering papers! Unfortunately, not everybody seems to wish to support my applications, I mean I could do the jobs at the head of Disney (I know some right cartoon characters)Amazon (not the river) even Google (as I know some know it all’s as well)thankfully I get bored quite easily ………..oh a butterfly (allegedly) I’m a natural, I’m not sure what I’m not sure what I’m a natural at (answers to FUCKWIT.COM) I’m sure at some point somebody will take the time to point something out to me!

Alternatively I could be become a best selling author (yeah right) I have an idea about a girl called Chastity who after years of troubled relationships she deicide’s simply that to lead a life of Chasity, a bit like two and a half men in reverse……..oh look a butterfly, for some reason I simply cant seem to concentrate. I could apply for the position of  the new el chappo, I reckon I could run a Mexican drug cartel, think of the improvements I could make, proper emergency lighting in the tunnels, omitting one lux of light (that’s the equivalent of moonlight boys and girls) I could ensure that proper manual handling could be carried out, not one person lifting more than 24 KG I mean it’s simply criminal! he should be locked up for not looking after his staff……oh hang on he is, Oooops.

You  may have realised I don’t handle being off very well, it’s simply called the work of idle hands, no money means bored.com , the boo hoo club all of the above, I’m sure that there won’t be a blog on day 5, maybe a coat that ties around the back, cunning plans have come unstuck due to the weather, I’m going outside, I may be some time, at least I still have a hat, until the next time , watch the skies , keep spreading the disease……….Toodles!