As I get older (yeah me) I feel more alone and disconnected with the world, My phone is my one and only constant companion and thanks to it's confidence I can connect with the outside world! As I feel more and more lost my phone calmly knows how to help me to reach my destination, as I struggle to remember even mundane facts like the name of a film or a type of........(damn where's my phone) my phone literally recalls everything I need (the smug little bastard). As I increasingly lose the memory of verbs nouns and adjectives (actually did I ever know them) that were there to help articulate the small grey cells, my own thoughts that little black piece of plastic taunts me with it's instant access to every word that has ever been written.
There is and can only be one possible conclusion slowly (like skynet) the phone is taking over the world (don't laugh) .....when the hell did my brain get outsourced (at least it's in my own accent) to make matters worse it bloody well knows it, Now it's starting to screw with me (please join the queue) simply because it can! several times a day it buzzes me in my pocket and not in a sexual way, alerting me to the fact that some vital piece of information has just arrived. but when I look nothing at all (WTF) no email, no text no alert, was the vibration all in my head and some kind of sick wishful need?
I don't think so I think it's screwing with me, the thing is (not so gently) mocking me and not just mine it's all of them every single one, they are slowly robbing us of our intelligence (hahahaha yeah right) of our humanity even, it can only be a matter of time before a newer model arrives with its own opposable thumb, hell yeah they are smart evil genius smart (who are you calling paranoid?).
I have to get the message out to the world before it's too late ah bollocks I have no signal what the hell is...............................
I did warn you lot until the next time I do believe I'm on a roll until the next time Toodles!
No comments:
Post a Comment