Photograph

It never rains but it pours, the shit that has been bubbling away in the background boiled over and since the last blog everything has turned to rat shit, but you know what but the world has kept turning and I know some people ain't happy with my "don't give a shit attitude" that's just too tough it's got me this far, so fuck the world and the horse it rode in on.Thankfully some canny words of encouragement brought me back from the brink the lady knows what to say at just the right time!

Work was OK for the best part, but on Friday it just started to unravel, everything coming to a monumentus fuck you at the close of play, we trudged through the night but a series of rants pushed me close to the edge, of which there would have been no coming back from, we slept on it only for me to wake up with the Hurricane's knees in my back and the slow realisation that it hadn't been a dream.

We had had an outstanding cunning plan that had not come to fruition, thanks to Mother Nature kicking our arse last weekend, so the grand romantic gesture was put on hold, we both needed a pick me up and it was going to go ahead by hook or by crook, the ball set in motion but the Kraken threw a curve ball that was carefully deflected and put into a holding pattern we were still ago and off we went, as always though a Magpie flew past and before I could salute and say good morning me and the wife were in full anger mode and at each others throats, mainly due to external circumstances we needed to vent and that's what we did, something over nothing and the wind blew the stress away(literally as I had not returned to the land of flatulence) we arrived in Gosforth quite relaxed and we picked the Professor (as he shall know be known as) up and headed to Jesmond Dene.

A few months previously I had realised that we had no photo's of us as a couple, apart from our wedding photo's, I hate my picture taken, it's like a small piece of my soul is being taken, and I will not let it go quietly, every time a camera is produced I do a runner I have never liked my picture taken even when I was skinny with a full head of hair (yes I remember ancient history) so as a gesture to the wife I suggested to her that we should use our good friend the professor to take us on a shoot, once we were back on track there was no turning back, so with clean underwear attached we arrived at our destination.

It wasn't really what I expected I had expected, something totally glamorous....erm no it was me and the wife taking the piss with the professor adding the odd insult, so it was all good! the shoot (hey I know all the lingo I'm a media whore darling) flew over and apart from a few moments when I felt as though I was a member of a reformed NWOBHM band member(short fat and bald) it was all good, actually the experience was not what I had been concerned about, relaxed, entertaining and in all honesty fun spelt with a capital F. shoot completed we bade our farewell although we worried as the professor had forgotten his angina spray so we didn't know if his overworked ticker would take the strain we even did our best Zoolander pose!

Once back in Gimpsville we sat with baited breath and ordered Chinese food and then all of a sudden they were there and you know what, OK so I look my age (a sprightly 27) they look great, just what the doctor ordered, a great tonic for the troops and we will no doubt argue which is the best shot (my fave is the one with the wife sticking her fingers up at me! we are not a conventional couple) I did have a few niggles mainly how fat I looked and the fact I still look like a bag of shit tied off in the middle, the wife looked Fab it was great to see her taken out of our continuous shit loop and for her to enjoy herself!

I was going to do this tomorrow but with yet another deadline day looming and with a HUGE list of chores to do, I realise I need to focus and trust me I had nothing else on my dance card! thanks for the words of encouragement (you know who you are) things are what they are but I'm not giving up just yet so watch the skies a new book should be on it's way by the next blog is ready and I know life is shit, don't worry about I always knew it was until the next time .....Toodles!