Keep The Faith

And so it came to pass in the bad old days some fecker told you what to do or what to think those days are long gone! THANK FUCK!

I know some people will think that this part is going to be a long rant about religion well it’s not as far as I’m concerned you can believe whatever you want it’s your life, I have no desire to affect anybody else’s belief’s I have no intention of forcing my way of life on anybody and that includes anybody in my immediate orbit! Do you believe in an individual that’s up to you and good luck with that I hope it works out for you!

Me hell yeah I believe in something! I have absolutely no idea in what, but at times of doubt talking to someone up there helps me so what! I believe it’s what I want to believe not some grey haired old dude on a cloud or a fat (hang on that’s a tad close to me) gadgy or whatever deity there is out, most of my beliefs are Karma driven I’m a believer that if I do something bad something equally bad will actually happen to me (I must have been really bad in a previous life hahaha), superstitious it might be but who cares other than me it’s my belief so fuck you!

I was brought up within a religious family and if you want to know I enjoyed it, I didn’t have any issues, Sunday school got us out of the boring part of the service old farts singing and all the other stuff that goes with it, sitting reading (fab I loved it) books or drawing and colouring (uurgh I could take it or leave it) and sometimes presents of books and the such like it was an informal way of getting religion into somebody’s life and I didn’t have an issue with it, what  I did have an issue (you should have seen this one coming)was when my mother who was deeply religious until the day she died, was cast aside by the church she loved like she was nothing (which in reality she wasn’t) and thats where most of this ranting is going to come from!

If you have got this far you will have my thoughts on various other things including divorce and the such like so this kind of ties in with what I have ranted about before (hahaha) we lived in Gimpsville for my first few years and we went to Christchurch in Gimpsville (still one of my favourite churches) and all that entailed, we went as a family it wasn’t something my mum pushed on us and to be truthful we went because we wanted to, I have no recollection at that stage of me and my brother rebelling against religion why would we were just kids, When we moved out on to the delta and rather than get public transport (even in the golden age of the seventies it was nonexistent on a Sunday morning) we went to a local service by the same vicar in the local school hall, or rather by the curate as the vicar sometimes didn’t give a shit for about fifteen families on the edge of his community (oops sorry bile starting to creep in even at that age I thought that) but again I didn’t have an issue with it, again more reading and the such like.

Then the divorce happened and those men of religion started turning up to offer advice (which at the time was probably more than they would do but damn they were so out of sync with the world view even then) and that was that my mother should stay with a husband who was obviously a dodgy tosser (sorry technical description) now at this moment my mother showed her real steel and basically said she wanted to do her own thing (good for her) it was at  this point she became a pariah and for a little while she was refused communion even at the local service and I can vividly remember her leaving me and my brother at home and for her to go to Christchurch and the main service and she was actually refused entry (you sanctimonious pieces of .....continued at havearant.com) and it was the only time that I ever remember her being truly upset over the divorce we are not talking faceless members of the community we are talking about somebody who was a personnel friend of the vicar and curate, it was at this point me and my brother got rebellious and we didn’t hold back what we thought, the first time I ever voiced an opinion and my mother never told us to behave you reap what you sow I believe is the lesson.

My brother and I continued to go until we were confirmed and for the last few years until that point we were totally rebellious and she had a real struggle on her hands. But in her eyes she had made a promise for us to go until we were indeed confirmed, in fact after I was confirmed they only got one photograph as I was headed out the door and as I went I told the vicar in no uncertain terms never to speak to me again after the treatment of my mother he was fair game as far as I was concerned, that started a period of unrest for my mum, thankfully new people came to the church and they were treated cordially but they knew not to try and be anything other than civil with those boys because we would shred them to bits, there was one curate who upon discovering where I worked he actually said “you look after my pension plan” it was instant hatred from there on in, things in fact came to ahead when the former husband of my sister in law got the full treatment for having his second (and third) marriages blessed at our church, my brother stood and harangued the staff for weeks with the hypocrisy here were people who didn’t even go to church being allowed things that my mother wasn’t allowed and we as two loving sons showed a united front of kicking of big style.

Over the years it got better and indeed staff of later years were a lot more receptive (hahaha that’s because more of their flock got divorced)   but even then they knew not to talk about anything religious around us just keep it simple, thankfully my mum was welcomed back into the fold at the main church and she even took my niece (because she wanted to go with her Nana and that’s not a bad thing in my book) primarily to christingle services and the such like, my mum when she passed was buried from Christchurch and to be honest I didn’t take it all in for fecks sake I was burying my mother but it was exactly what my mum would have wanted, although I haven’t been in the church since I think my days with that church are done.

My kids were not brought up with any particular religious beliefs and if they had wanted to go I would have took them, they both went to a Catholic school so I suppose they knew what they needed to, some of my family are still religiously bigoted as Gimpsville is still to a small degree (thankfully shrinking all the time) bigoted you couldn’t be a tradesman at Consett steel works if you were a catholic you wouldn’t get a job in certain industries according to which church you went to (that’s in all denominations) Pathetic to think that even in this day and age that religion still has a bearing on what you want to do with your life, one of my uncles whenever he met one of my girlfriends would ask “what foot do you kick a ball with?” he soon stopped, and for a while I took pleasure in telling him a girl was catholic even if she wasn’t, sad old twat!

Another glorious thing about religion and it was perpetuated by the actual churches, when my first wife who I married in a registry office although she was a catholic, I did offer to get married in a church for her sake but she didn’t want to force her religion on me(yeah right like she had a say in it!), but when we moved to Gimpsville, religion was reignited in her (was it because of me hahaha was I the devil incarnate I think not) she was refused communion and all that goes with it, because she was not married in the eyes of her church. I came home from work one Sunday to discover her crying I took her straight back to the church to do whatever was necessary to make my wife happy. I had never been in this particular church (why would I, I wasn’t a catholic but I did have a keen interest as my father had been the clerk of works when the church was being built the only protestant on the job) and because I like churches I was having a good old look around, well I forgot that Catholics genuflect so yes you guessed the wife bent her knee and me not looking I went right over the top of her “infidels” you could hear the cries of horror from the congregation hahaha like I gave a care! Nobody would sit next us (must have been the horns) and Father smith was over the moon that I was prepared to bring any children up as Catholics (there was never any intention for children hahaha) but he nearly swallowed his cup when he found out that my local church was indeed Christchurch hahahaha oh that was one fun night and when he said I had to go through lessons he got the message that I didn’t need to  go once I started quoting religious scripture at him chapter and verse (it’s like football you want the same thing and even the strips are the same but you do feel the need to hate each other) I will have to admit that I wasn’t aware that I had so much religion in me, but I got my message across and as for the lessons I never did go.

The blessing was short and sweet like the rest of the marriage and the religious aspect didn’t stop her cheating on me ah bless, she was probably absolved in confession or was that the cunning plan all along, who knows, who cares, be honest, tell the truth and if you have to move on, then move on don’t lie and certainly don’t hurt someone who thinks that you love them as much as they think that they love you! Most of my friends are Catholics I really have no issue with any religion as long as they don’t try and ram it down my throat that stands for Muslims, Buddhists any religious order good luck to you and all who sail with you, but that is your choice not mine so don’t come to me with your ideals and I won’t come anywhere near you with me!

I love churches and for many years I would seek them out wherever I was living for the solace and for me to contemplate whatever was flowing that brain of mine, usually a shit load of turmoil and I was usually (thankfully) left to my own devices thankfully any church will do, any denomination I don’t care it’s the solitude I crave and I don’t do it as much as I used to but I’m more than happy in my life so maybe thats not a bad thing, I’m not against religion as I said at the beginning, what I am against is bigoted people trying to enforce the indocterined beliefs onto somebody who may belief most of what they are preaching they just don’t like the way it’s been force fed to the masses, we are supposed to intelligent people let us make our own decisions without the Spanish inquisition. It’s exactly that thought process that over the years that has killed millions (and still is) because people twist the words of whatever prophet they follow so that it fits their skewed view of the world!

I’m a firm believer in eat drink and be merry and fuck the rest of them! Oops sorry went into rant mode just a little bit, normal service will now be resumed! Until the next time …..Toodles.