A devil in me

I was going to subtitle this blog one fat bastard but apparently, I’m not allowed to put myself down, this blog is meant to have a more serious edge to it (allegedly) so here goes.

I can vividly remember as a kid in a lesson in junior school about diet and I wondered how people could indeed get fat, 98% of people who I went to school with were indeed skinny I didn’t believe that if you ate food you got fatter (what the hell do teachers know) and for a few years I went along with my theory when I went in the army I weighed seven stone four pounds (there was some discussion when I went in if I was heavy enough to carry all my kit -I was ) and after I came out I was still only over eight stone, but I did come out with the weight of the world on my shoulders and I had finally discovered the wonders of alcohol and with that I was indeed infected by the munchies, however I was still quite active playing Football, Squash, Canoeing and a multitude of other sports that people who weren’t in relationships  and discover that they either exercise or spend time in the pub, at one point when I was doing silly hours working and travelling for work my exercise regime went out of the window I hit thirteen stone (you fat bastard) it was at this point that I stopped the booze and concentrated on the exercise.

Two north run’s a London marathon several Phoenix thirteen’s swimming or running every dinner time five a side football and I was soon back to a more manageable 10 stone six and I was able to maintain that for a quite a while, until happiness or was it sadness set in, I slowly set about eating my way through the world and its surrounding planets and my weight slowly set about heading northwards slowly at first and it’s funny how you never realise at first, but then you start looking for excuses all the while you do less and less, the main reason and this is no excuse I take full responsibility for my sloth and gluttony I met the wife and moved completely away from the friends that I used to do sporty things with, I should have discovered new ways to exercise, or even new groups of people who I could have done those things with but no I settled into the rut of a new relationship and one I was happy to be in (again I take full responsibility I am an adult) and slowly the weight increased.

I did not go quietly when the youngest was born I insisted that I would get fit again and lose the excess weight but my efforts were indeed half hearted for what reason I have no idea I was in a loving relationship with a family who I wanted to be with few worries and only a few niggles (the Kraken always a constant thorn in my side) but nothing as far as I’m aware that should have sent me plummeting into the fridge on a regular basis, my main issue with my (mental) health was on the up and improving everyday so what was the issue? if I wanted to I could find a million small things to blame it on but let’s be real here nobody forced me to be a glutton and yes when I’m as heavy as I am when I’m down (for any small thing) food tells me it’s the way forward when I know it’s not the case, I don’t take money to work for that reason because I would be in a shop buying shite whenever I feel stressed (at this moment with the work load I have, I would be sat in Poundland buying so many sweets hahaha) food I know is not the answer to my questions age is catching up and the seriousness of my condition will raise its ugly head soon enough.

Previously I was able to lose over four stone, but my knees put paid to that and a severe case of the mind funk caught up with me and I did once again start to munch through all the crap hidden in the back of the cupboard, but I am back on track one day at a time (the wife doesn’t help by bringing all that lovely grub home hahaha) and by watching what I eat I will slowly start bringing my weight down, I will admit that drinking doesn’t help (which is why I rarely drink now) the munchies attack me everytime, I still like my food and why not I just have to learn to eat good food and stop when my belly aches ......Yeah Right good luck on that one, I’m in a good place even with the debt of a small African nation around my neck and the amount of work being thrown at me, I still think that as long as I wake up happy, that’s all I can ask for and to be a better person and to steer clear from the evil that is called Food!

I now have to give some serious thought to my health as although I am still losing weight my diabetes has gone through the roof, all of my joking aside about my condition, life has indeed taken a very serious turn for the worse, but for once I am not forlorn I know I can do this, I know I have to do this so if you see me on the street consuming what looks like to be a small animal (that’s eating a kebab boys and girls) please feel free to knock it from my grasp and just say NO! you know I will not give up to easily this one second chance that I do not intend to let slip from fingers, until next time Toodles!