Animals

The question of the day is do I make this blog part of a trilogy or a quadrilogy? Do I keep the Pink Floyd theme going or quit while I'm ahead, the numbers have been astonishing with over 8000 hits for the "We rock" blog "Wish you were here" has done around 150! what makes a good blog and what makes an average one? how did all those Visigoths turn up and read that particular blog? I have no idea, I just have to go with the flow and see what each passing tide brings! I wish I could tell what gives, I have to admit I was always happy with triple digits I never thought I would hit four digits purely as most of the time I'm writing shite, at least I can be consistent!

So onwards with the theme of the day ....drink, friends and funnies! oh and G getting told off just once or twice (allegedly) the week had flowed to it's natural conclusion, lots of work, the wife losing here temper with me, as it was and always is my fault, even though she never does what I ask her to do for the best results to contact me at work, we have a perfectly sorted out way of contacting each other and she as always does what she wants to, cue much shouting and cussing with some gnashing of gums thrown in for good measure all on her behalf, the shouting died down to a dull roar while we did what I didn't want to do, nothing new there then and we headed for home, just in time for the rain to come hammering down, we had been invited to a Halloween party and although the wife had a good idea for her costume ( a number of variations on a theme and damn I thought she looked good) but I had nothing, I did say get me a grey onesie and I would go as a humpback whale, that didn't go down too well, cue much looking online for ideas, all horribly expensive and it was just putting me in a funk of not wanting to go. I'm not that artistic (no I got that one right not autistic!) but I would rather go as a tramp than have something pushed on me, the conversation ended but I knew we would more than likely cross swords with the new morning.

Off to bed but not before a rather large glass of Jack, why because I could, although the home made ice was indeed substandard I struggled on, finally to climb the wooden hill to dream of chasing rabbits and the such like. At 3.50 I was dancing around our bed room like a Russian ballerina with cramp (hello old friend it's been a while where the hell have you been?) when inspiration hit me, I'm fat (go figure) I could wear my Homer Simpson T-shirt where my head is substituted for his, turn me into a zombie with my red Hawaiian shirt and I can be a zombified holiday Homer I had my idea I just then need to get rid of the cramp and collapse back into the bed to the land of nod!

We awoke to even more rain of biblical proportions and we had to head off to a local shop to get the finishing touches for my zombie, I don't think the wife was happy with my choice but when I hit on something I can tend to be a tad stubborn (allegedly) although I don't think I have ever really been stubborn (I mean really stubborn I shall keep my powder dry on that one because I know at some point I will have to unleash my shield of stubbornness at some point) a short jaunt to our new Tesco's for some drinkie poo's and we were set, and still it continued to rain.

As we sorted ourselves out, the old man of the house up to the Kraken's, I got bath bathed and wiped down, the wife looked liked a pirate and I looked like the fat oaf I felt, with white stuff on my head, oh dear. as always not on time but not really late we headed out with our mini ark not really realising how much it had rained with over flowing road drains as they just couldn't cope with the flowing rivers of rainwater, we ducked and dived around floods, me getting annoyed as we were now in danger of being late and I hate being late oh yes I really hate being late, thankfully the further into our journey we went the dryer it got and once through the hell that is (no I can't even bring myself to name it) we able to make time up thanks to the flux capacitor, we were warmly greeted by our hosts, and once gravestones wings and errant pinheads were in place we jumped into a taxi to head off to our final destination, the poor taxi driver got an ear bashing as he kept knocking down E's gravestones (and no that's not a euphuism) we soon got him to a sensible speed but I'm sure he thought he had fallen down the rabbit hole!

Upon arriving we were met by the master vampire of the house, and we were swept of into the crypts, and then in the words of Ozzy Osbourne  "let the madness begin" as always please don't assume that you will get a blow by blow account of all the madness, I have already been warned, death threats, being sued and G's manly embrace if I didn't behave myself and curb my journalistic urgings! there was much hilarity drink and thrusting of loins, well that was just one person who actually took his thong off in a food preparation area, thankfully we had all eaten so the last chicken in Sainsbury's joke wasn't deemed appropriate, and thankfully I really didn't wish to see any of the piercings at all  (run away run away) the crypt seemed quite quiet as the masters of the house were visiting next door (actually that should read destroying as Loki was indeed living up to his name as he destroyed the kitchen to try and get to us his loving audience) lots of great company, some awesome costumes, next year I will not rely on cramp at stupid o'clock in the morning, I will put some effort in....I'm sure the grey onesie would have been a better choice!

The dogs finally ensconced in their own home, food arrived with just a little bit more inkyhol, the night crept on I received a great compliment, some one thought I was 41 - 42 I was happy  that  they thought I was that skinny then realised that they meant age wise (WTF) then I knew the drink had really kicked in. The karaoke was by now in full flow and I shrank to the back of the house as much as I wish  that I could sing, I'm under no illusion that the Newcastle Evening Chronicle wouldn't employ me to shout Chroniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicle! by now my knees were suffering, so although I appeared to be the shy wallflower (me with my reputation) I was glad of the rest, mind you I was accused of being quiet all night and a certain person was concerned about my well being I always thought I was usually a quiet kind of guy (cough splutter) the party was in full swing and it appeared that everybody was having a great time ....including me (go figure) it was even noted that it was late into the morning we were all having such a great time. Loki took a shine to the stuff on my head and proceeded to lick most of it off, I finally bumped back into the wife who looked flushed and happy , flushed not being a good thing as she crashed and burned about a minute later it's like we were on some internal  synchronicity as I turned up just in time to catch her, once we dragged her body outside to cool down, E gathered the troops ready for to head home we said our farewells, but I bet the party headed on way past the dawn patrol, it's a really great feeling seeing people enjoying themselves it really is a tonic for the troops!

Taxi arrived I sat with the corpse bride in the back, the poor driver had to contend not only with a merry G but his pinhead mask as well, at least the gravestones had gone down a treat and we weren't bringing any home with us so he didn't get it in the neck from E, once in the hotel Jagermiester after dragging G in from standing in the middle of the road  in full pinhead regalia I'm, sure if anybody saw it  they would have tried to run him down (see E you could have had your bed all to yourself and G could have had a hospital one) we all climbed the wooden hill , G getting told off for good measure (I'm sure it's just his comfy blanket, and that he couldn't/wouldn't sleep if he didn't!) a lot of threats were issued  (D notice slapped on the rest of this paragraph at the request of Cookie) but I will be honest and tell the truth, the rohipnol   (or flunitrazepam to give its official name....I know because I looked it up) that G had been feeding me kicked in and I was soon counting sheep waiting for the onslaught of cramp that never happened (woo hoo).

Dawn broke and we slept on I awoke to find the wife as usual checking to see if I had a pulse so deep was the sleep I was  in, the party being over we arose from our slumber and said good morning to the world and our hosts with G being on form as usual although I thought  that there was an unusual amount of love in the room when E said she would buy the neighbours house just so that G would be close to her ah bless what next a dual plot at the local cemetery so that G can be kept in check for all eternity....erm maybe not as we climbed into our little car I would have sworn Cookie was back in her/our room giving us the finger big style!

We arrived home and ....well I had to blog didn't I, juices were flowing and I wanted to get this out before I became the morose (I really mean miserable bastard the wife says I am)individual who writes unhappy blogs, anyhoo loads of cunning plans are being developed, another Buckets trip which we will miss Heaven Or Hell (which wasn't cancelled the site just isn't clear about the forthcoming gigs....the bastards) a full day in the town that will be so bloody messy! I will need to get a small book for all the evidence ....I mean sub plots!

Will the numbers continue I have no idea, and if I'm honest I have no idea it was what it was I have no intention of trying to capture lightning in a bottle twice, I can only do what I do and if enough people like  it , well we will see I am happy with triple digits hell I was happy with single digits so everything else is all good. a short(ish) week at work then time to regroup and see where we go from here, upwards is the hope. although I am gearing up to kick off with the NHS , although the next chapter of the new book is writing itself at the moment (abandon hope....I wish I could get away from bloody song titles) so there you have it, I hope actually... no I don't.... read do what you may, cunning plans are abound, the Pink Floyd name game ends with this blog as the next one would be The Wall, and do you know what? after a great party last night, I'm not that depressed at the moment, so until the next time Toodles!