Magic Bus

People really do not like their personal space invaded, you only need to travel by plague carrier (public transport boys and girls) to get a better insight into the human condition.

I do travel on a regular basis by plague carrier and at times I indulge in bus seat bingo from time to time (ok most days if I’m in the mood), I am not going to go into detail (again) here  as I do believe I covered it a number of times in the blogs , People really do like their own little world the way that people sit by themselves until they have no other option but to (shock horror) have to actually sit with another human being, some of the tricks to try and keep the seat to themselves is funny , well it would be if it wasn’t so sad.

Having said that I must either look like Ted Bundy (or is it Al) or simply the nutter on the bus, it’s very rarely that anybody sits next to me and I do none of the usual tried and trusted methods to keep the seat to myself. I don’t do the man slide whereby I try to slide and spread over as much of the seat as possible, I don’t do the bag seat where the bag is put next to me and encroaches into the other seat, I have to admit if anybody does this one, I make a bee line to sit on the offending article, the only thing that I will avoid is a crusty, smelly person, even with my sense of smell (quite poor) I’m not a fan.

Old people you think would enjoy the company, hell no they are the worst offenders, travelling homeward bound is a ghastly nightmare, I think if I was to pass my driving test (hahahahahaha) I would miss all of the weirdos and funny people, I wouldn’t miss the charvas and the knackers that do populate the afternoon and night services, but all people by and large I would say on public transport are anti-social, they simply do not want their space invaded , there is a guy who gets on my bus on a regular basis who will not sit next to anybody except blondes (surely I’m not the only person to have noticed) actually most of the girls tend to sit in a pack at the back of the bus, so yes maybe they have noticed, he really does make your flesh crawl!

The people who sit in the outside seat with nobody in the window seat who spit out their dummies when you state that you want to sit in the seat next to them (well it is empty). They sulk for the bulk of the journey simply because you ask them to twist in the seat, I suppose i could always sit in your lap! the school kids who bounce around like rubber balls full of Ritalin if they aren’t on it they bloody well should be! The people who have pushchairs who think that they have a divine right to the seated area at the front, yes they do have an equal right to be on the bus but for god’s sake work out when the buses will be empty so that there is not a screaming match, the unhelpful staff, who in all honesty have probably been abused all day every day, but that is the nature of the job, I will say that the staff are getting to be so much better,  most  of the grumpy guts have retired and shuffled off to the great Bus Depot in the sky, I can’t wait until I retire so that I never have to spend over 2 hours a day with grumpy types!

Short and sweet is the order of the day  and what was in my head this morning, as always it was much funnier when it’s in there, no little black book to note my thoughts  I envisaged a much larger blog with all of the idiosyncrasies of the populations of the various  wagons heading to and from Gimpsville, watch the skies …..Incoming and until the next plague carrier …….Toodles