This is not a piffle re-tread this is an actual blog…………………go
figure!
It’s been six weeks since my last attempt at a blog
and again it’s all been part of my little social experiment I have been
conducting! I have been fooling myself of late and I basically have needed to
give my head a shake. Apathy has been the order of the day for no other reason
than I have felt sorry for myself, nothing major, nothing approaching doomsday
just slightly off kilter!
Ill health has been kicking my arse since the
beginning of the year and I just can’t shake it, I sort something out then another
beast raises its head, it’s all a bit tiresome. It hasn’t been funny, I have
also been suffering from severe allergic reactions which have been decidedly
scary, the last one wiped out my entire day, I have no idea (neither does the
Dr) what has been causing them, but let’s be honest, they have scared the living
crap out of me, no dark humour on my behalf, I am taking them very seriously.
The wife has been poorly as well she had 8 weeks on
the sick (a long boring medical explanation if required is continued at
suckitbuttercup.com) and no pay has holed us beneath the waterline financially,
with little or no social interaction, life has decided to pick on us this year,
this year has been a no hold holds bare knuckle fight every step of the way for
both of us, it’s meant to get easier.
Work has been a ball ache, the fallout of the
Greenfell fire in London has seen my workload literally just go through the roof, massive
workloads with little timescales to deal with the workload, add everything else
into the mix is why I have been keeping a low profile, I initially did this
blog as a fun thing, and I have noticed that there’s huge amounts of darkness
in amongst the blogs, even after I have said that I am going to pull my socks
up, I have struggled and although I do feel positive within me, I am struggling
to show it. I feel as though not only have I been burning the candle at both
ends with work and the wife’s need of support, it feels at the moment I have
then gone and taken a flamethrower to the middle of the candle and let’s just
say I feel a tad off. I feel the time has come for an overhaul.
Originally I wrote a blog after some night out with
dear friends, these have been few and far between, hence the colouring of the
blogs have been Black with a capital B, no matter what I tried, I even
attempted to do some historical ones and they simply came out pap, I know how
critical this is for me and so therefore I have decided to place myself on the
bench, after I post this blog I intend to give myself at least 12 weeks away
from the blog, numbers have been steady with people still visiting and reading
all the old blogs (on average 30 hits a day for old blogs from all over the
world) so I know that there is a readership, maybe misery does indeed love
company!
I am ok in the grand scheme of things, my health and the financial constraints of our already fragile social life have played a huge part to our problems (We still receive visits from the RAF squadron based out of South Shields which are very much appreciated) and to any of my
friends (actual) who do read this we are not avoiding
anybody, and we will return to your open arms as soon as we are back on an even
keel. So, don’t despair we are waving not drowning, the blog will return, at
some point I’m not sure in what format sometimes you have to tear stuff down to
restart all over again, this is genuinely me trying for once to put myself and
my wife first and foremost, we will get there, I just don’t know when or how.
A big thank you to all of the people who have messaged
me over the last few weeks from all over this blue pearl we call planet earth, I
am maintaining radio silence and will be running silent running deep , if I can
recommend an album to play while doing this it would be Lonely Robots stunning
new masterpiece the big dream, the first ones pretty awesome as well so until
the next time, whenever that will be, look to
the skies for incoming, I do have a cunning plan I just don’t know how
to put it all together………YET…………….Toodles!
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