Saturday 6 May 2017

Once again


I am a ditz! Trust me its official I haven’t got a clue and as I get older I get worse! The wife and the youngest are indeed the I T department of our house I’m usually OK if I’m shown but if I have to read about something and then physically do it (not a cat in hells chance) it just won’t happen every time I go publish my books I know I will scratch my head and try and work out how I did it in the first place a true WTF moment.

Was I always like this no not really, but as I get older I become more impatient and have a tendency to rush headlong into things (that’s how I screwed up my website) I look at G who takes his time and is methodical in most things and seems to have a grasps on the mechanics of life the universe and everything that goes with it! Me I’m a total ditz if I took a breath I would probably do alright, I was all right in the army stripping weapons and stuff like that because it was always a practical demonstration although I doubt I would be able to strip out a magazine these days never mind strip a weapon down.

My camera is a prime example I know somebody who has the same camera and uses it to take pictures at concerts which are usually pretty damn good, mine look like I’m having an epileptic seizure with only one out of ten being any good, and he won’t tell us how he does it bless that’s one of the reasons he’s no longer a friend, me if I know how to do something and somebody wants to know I have no issues with telling anybody maybe it’s because I’m such a nice guy hahaha! Or potentially just a bloody soft touch!

The wife is like a dog with a bloody bone and won’t let anything go she is tenacious, me I just go Basil Fawlty on stuff, trash it throw it in the bin and move on, I know that it’s not a good personality trait but what can I do about it nowadays it’s is far too late to teach this old dog new tricks.

Somebody actually said to me I was born too late (I believe I may have said this in an earlier blog/book not that I can remember I am old you know) that I would have been better off born in the forties, I would at least have an excuse for my technophobia, now it’s just because I’m a dumb ass, I was surprised I actually passed the fire extinguisher exam, not that it’s a particularly hard thing to do you could train a monkey to do it in ten minutes granted it took me twenty hahaha but passed I did with a great sigh of relief, I could have lost my job at the time if I hadn’t (I certainly would not have been flavour of the month I know that).

The wife loves gadgets she is presently trying to get me sell my gall bladder for some new piece of technology and she is not a sharer (thank god), we will have to see if I can grow a fresh one before Christmas, anything new and she lusts after it hell we had two (yes two) TiVo’s long before virgin media got their hands on them, we got her a Kitchenaid mixer and I’m sure we will have cakes once again, sometime soon. In the near future or maybe just before the new millennium! I better stop now before she beats me to death with either a TiVo or even the Kitchenaid. Until the next time ...........................Toodles!

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