Ok so the title is a lying piece of crap, but we will get there all in due time, because of what has gone on in the world of roller coasters, I need you all to keep your feet and arms tucked in, this is going to be one long and bumpy ride.........................oh and yes drink was involved .....well sort of Hic!
So I had worked the weekend and took time in lieu for Monday doing some research of the settee kind (it has to be done) and I was quite relaxed when I went back to the asylum, on a duty shift so a late start to the day, politics soon came into play and I walked away not wishing to get involved, its not a game I play well and the aftermath usually ends up looking like a wedding scene from Game Of thrones (a tad bloody) if you get my drift, I only had to deal with one stupid person in the shift and I didn't have to hide anybody's body (I suppose that's a good thing then) a quiet journey home on the plague carrier in the arms of my first love (Music .........calm down ) listening to early AC DC why well because I can...........and I did so there!
Being nightshift the following two days so we could escape off into the wilds of Northumberland for a friends wedding, meant a lazy first day although I did get some snoozing done later in the day I was quite refreshed when I headed to the asylum to cause chaos and mayhem, I always love the look on peoples faces when I turn up and give a cheery smile to all the staff who hate me being on nightshift (if I'm there working then so are you ) the shift was over quickly, however I didn't get as much done as I would have liked, times flies just a tad fast! home in the wee hours of the morning, I sneaked in like I had been night clubbing (that's right knocking everything over) I was soon ensconced in my pit snoring like a small outboard motor ( and not like a bloody tanker like the wife insists I do). was up and out of bed for nine with a nice breakfast and more of the same, some revision for this new job interview (still no word but anytime soon) and no snooze, this could end in pain and misery!
As it happens it didn't, well not for us (however the poor bunny that was caught in the headlights of a Volvo car that weighs just over a ton and a half may not agree) more of the same, more misery for the staff (well they whinge that management don't visit them enough, I do it two nights on the trot and well you can guess ...........Tee Hee) again a jaunt back home in the early hours and again creeping through the house to my pit, back up at nine and a full English (mmmmm) and a completely lazy day I was determined to avoid any negativity all work items were switched off and buried deep somewhere in the house, I didn't hurry the wife, I let her dictate the pace that the day was about to go at......which was slooooooow!
Once everything was sorted we headed off, bank first (sod the overdraft) petrol second and then a lovely scenic trip to our destination, just me and the wife no negativity, no bitching..............no seriously this is how its meant to be! we got there bang on time parked outside the hotel booked in and chilled a bit more, we then sensibly decided to go to the local Geordie Embassy (Greggs) as we weren't sure as to when we would receive sustenance, back to the room for me to blink for a longer period then recommended, the wife then takes a photo for evidence purposes (I go back to the car to see I still have that shovel) then the appointed time is here and we sort of float like angels to the bar..............I didn't say what kind of angels!
Then the party got into full swing, peeps who I know, some not nearly as well as the wife does, but I was intending to be on my best behaviour (well sort of), now as always I no have intention of listing all of the shenanigans, if you were there you know what and where it happened if you weren't .........it was a great night! lets just say a great time was had by all, except when the DJ kept emptying the dance floor by playing "pop" music pfft! we soon showed him the error of his ways, now a lot of you reading this bit will be waiting for me to have my hissy fit, well I did have one, but I gave myself a good talking to and resolved all of my issues without upsetting people, I know I'm putting it here in the blog , honestly it was nothing, yes I did get a tad grumpy for a couple of minutes, and yes I nearly did kick off, yes I did want to break a chair over a big ponces head, but I didn't, I stepped outside had some fresh air counted to ten very slowly, then sucked it up and got on with it, what was it? actually sod all, so lets just put it to bed it didn't spoil mine or anybody else's night, now there's a first!
The only thing that spoilt the night in a small way was the price of the drink jeez London prices or what, the hotel was nice the staff helpful but Dick Turpin at the bar WTF, the wife wanted to be able to enjoy herself (and rightly so) so she ordered a glass of wine and a pint for me, £9.90 was the reply ...............erm shit what can we sell to have a bar bill, thankfully cunning plans were in full swing and other people had come well prepared (praise the lord and Halleluiah) only one person went to bed at 7.30 hahahahahaha ok it was just after 8 I think, some people thought they were in the spice girls and wouldn't have their picture taken, so much hilarity ensued when they thought that I had a camera in my hand (I didn't) and when I did (they didn't notice) so ahem you know who you are and if you are not nice when I have my stroke (another delightfully light conversation) you had better get me into that penthouse suite other wise those pictures will be leaked to the Hexham Cormorant, you know I mean it!
The night flowed as it was meant to great company, great music, some laughs, some dancing basically what life is meant to be and yes my life batteries were recharged even if the overdraft took a pounding, it was worth it just to see the wife having some fun with no worries, well other than me floating in the background , hell I even posed for pictures......yes me with my reputation, well life's too short I still think I have a face for radio! we stayed up way past everybody's bed time and some peeps (no names no pack drill) had a late supper, someone also had an emergency kebab by the side of their bed like a comfy blanket like the kids have, they know who they are! I will admit around midnight I was starting to flag, not enough sleep no CPAP mask and only half of medication was catching me up, however once my medication was taken I was better for it, still tired but I was able to reach the finish line unlike (cough splutter) like some people .............oooooh that's right I may have mentioned this already hahahahahaha it was good good good!
Bed for just after one and up for just after seven (well I needed my breakfast) we met up with all the usual suspects to go over the night and do it in much less raucous surroundings, we dragged it out as long as we could, a great time over way to quickly, any wedding disco that will play the song (that's the title of the blog) and had me on the dance floor (me with my reputation)has got to be damn good! the blog had the potential for two titles the one that won simply because it did get me on the dance floor throwing shapes like Ted Nugent who has just ingested half a ton of speed ...................hopefully no video footage exists (please lord please lord please lord) the other one was going to be Journey's Loving, Touching, Squeezing but a blow by blow account of the raising of a certain purple kilt well lets just say that the world and all its souls aren't ready for it, you could probably not stomach the gory deeds just going by the title, in the end the best one won through!
Actually you know something shit had to happen, a great time with great company the overdraft kicked into submission and we come home to the electric bill sat on the mat with both a knife and a baseball bat smiling, ah well shit happens, we are winning slowly but with barely no room to manoeuvre the fancy footwork doesn't always quite work a bit like the lad dancing like that DJ Pitbull, mind you I was just jealous, and so the universe reverts to shitiness as I type this just waiting for the first argument in seven days with the loving wife ........well it has to happen at some point don't worry you lot will be the first to know about, normal service resumes at the next blog keep spreading the disease, click like or whatever you have to do until the next time Toodles!
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